


I'm worried about -you-

by lovesicheng



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Fluff, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Sorry, Im lowkey proud of this um, Jihoon is a panicked gay, Jihoon just wants to pine in peace, M/M, Mingyu is whipped, This is me projecting my feelings in a story, aged-down characters, whoops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-27
Updated: 2018-05-27
Packaged: 2019-05-14 08:48:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14766384
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovesicheng/pseuds/lovesicheng
Summary: Soonyoung seemed perfect. His soft cheeks that made his face look adorable, yet, he still had a sharp jawline. He could dance, like a god. He could also sing, which many people can too, but when you're as perfect as Soonyoung being able to sing beautifully is kind of overkill.Leave some talent for the rest of us please.They've had classes together and they even have mutual friends. But Jihoon can't get himself to talk to the oh so popular flower boy. Every time he worked up enough courage to say hello Soonyoung gets surrounded by people, so ultimately Jihoon gave up. He likes Soonyoung but he doesn't like competing for peoples attention.That doesn't mean he can't look at him though.





	I'm worried about -you-

You're just too good to be true  
I can't take my eyes off you  
You'd be like heaven to touch  
I wanna hold you so much

Soonyoung seemed perfect. His soft cheeks that made his face look adorable, yet, he still had a sharp jawline. He could dance, like a god. He could also sing, which many people can too, but when you're as perfect as Soonyoung being able to sing beautifully is kind of overkill. 

Leave some talent for the rest of us please. 

Jihoon had noticed Soonyoung during their freshman year of highschool, he found him absolutely beautiful, but apparently everyone else did as well. Soonyoung within the first couple months of highschool he was always surrounded by girls, and boys who found him entrancing. 

Even now, senior year, Soonyoung is just as popular as he was then. Because he was so popular Jihoon has not had one conversation with him, sad, quite sad.

They've had classes together and they even have mutual friends. But Jihoon can't get himself to talk to the oh so popular flower boy. Every time he worked up enough courage to say hello Soonyoung gets surrounded by people, so ultimately Jihoon gave up. He likes Soonyoung but he doesn't like competing for peoples attention.

That doesn't mean he can't look at him though. 

He isn't going to lie to himself, he likes Soonyoung, a lot. But it's one of those pine from afar only crushes. 

In junior year when Soonyoung got a girlfriend Jihoon felt a range of emotions. Soonyoung was always hugging her and Jihoon would always find himself wishing he could be the one receiving those hugs, those bright smiles that everyone loved. 

But of course, even after they broke up Jihoon still couldn't talk to Soonyoung. And Soonyoung didn't so much as look Jihoon's way. 

Until he did and Jihoon wanted of go back to being invisible. Invisible Jihoon didn't feel funny whenever Soonyoung smiled at him, he didn't get nervous when Soonyoung so much as looked his way. 

At long last love has arrived  
And I thank God I'm alive  
You're just too good to be true  
Can't take my eyes off you

The first time Soonyoung noticed him was in the middle of the senior year, in their math class. Jihoon may have been staring(he definitely was). 

He didn't blame Soonyoung for turning over to meet his stare, he probably made him uncomfortable. When Jihoon flicked his eyes away and he heard a small laugh he knew he had been caught, well fuck, so much for being invisible. 

As soon as the class came to an end Jihoon walked out as fast as he could. 

He felt an arm sling around his shoulders as he made his way to the school's cafeteria. He immediately knew who it was, "What do you want Mingyu." 

"I just want to walk to lunch with my favorite shorty." Mingyu tightened his grip on Jihoon when he said that. 

"Fuck you, I'm not short you're just a tree." Jihoon 

Mingyu laughed and rubbed his head on Jihoon's in a loving yet childish manner, he had a habit of being very clingy. Jihoon hated it at first, a tall tree clinging to you is not what a small freshman who can barely get his mouth to open needs. But now he doesn't mind it.

When Jihoon and Mingyu sat at their usual table it came as no surprise to the two when Soonyoung waltzed in laughing with a bright smile on his face. Was it legal to have a smile as beautiful as Soonyoung's? Probably not. 

Today was definitely not Jihoon's day because he noticed Soonyoung say bye to his friends, nothing unordinary, until Soonyoung started walking over to their table. He waved at Mingyu as he did so, his smile never leaving his face. 

"Gyu, I know this is last minute but I really need a partner for the literature presentation." Soonyoung said as he sat down at their table, right across from Jihoon. 

"I can't. Wonwoo asked me to be his partner already, I'm sorry." Mingyu gave a small pout when he apologized. Soonyoung told him it wasn't a big deal and he would find someone else. He didn't leave the table though. Instead he turned to Jihoon(who might have died a little on the inside and the outside). 

Pardon the way that I stare  
There's nothing else to compare  
The sight of you leaves me weak  
There are no words left to speak

"You're Jihoon right?" a small smile was shot his way, Soonyoung was way too friendly for him and his awkward self. 

Jihoon nodded quickly. He would have liked to talk but the words weren't forming, being on the receiving end of Soonyoung's smile was really something else and it made it very hard to function. Plus Soonyoung knew his name, that's enough to kill him. And honestly death seemed like a better option. 

Mingyu seemed to notice how flustered Jihoon was because he started up a conversation with Soonyoung which ultimately took the attention off of the small, red boy. 

Soonyoung was too bright. His smile was so entrancing and Jihoon loved it, so he may have been staring, again. Soonyoung also may have noticed his stare, again. 

"You need to be more discreet, this is the second time I've caught you in one day." Soonyoung winked at Jihoon. 

Jihoon may have died at those words. 

"I just remembered I promised my other friends I'd sit with them!" Jihoon sputtered out and quickly stood up ignoring Mingyu's protests(his main one being that he had no other friends, he was right, but Jihoon couldn't do back to that table as long as Soonyoung was there). 

So he didn't go back. For the rest of the day he avoided Soonyoung and Mingyu. He felt a little bad for avoiding his dopey best friend but it had to be done. Mingyu didn't bring it up the next day, or the day after that and Soonyoung didn't try to talk to Jihoon. 

But weekends were a horrible(yet amazing) thing. 

But if you feel like I feel  
Please let me know that is real  
You're just too good to be true  
I can't take my eyes off you

It was 11am, early for Jihoon especially on a weekend. Out of sheer boredom he decided to invite Mingyu over, no harm could come out of that right? 

He picked up his phone and dialed his number when he heard a faint hello he started talking, or his attempt at talking while he was half asleep. 

"Minnie do you want to come over today?"

"Can I bring someone else? Cause I'm kind of with someone right now." Mingyu said and Jihoon sighed but said he could. Mingyu had nice friends so Jihoon didn't really care who he brought over. 

"Bye Minnie." He said and hung up as Mingyu was in the middle of a sentence.

About a half hour later he heard a knock at his bedroom door and knew it was Mingyu(his mom always let him in and at first it annoyed Jihoon but less walking for him so who was he to complain). He opened the door and upon seeing who he brought with him he slammed the door shut before anyone could say anything. 

"Ji, stop being dramatic." Mingyu laughed as he opened the door, picking up Jihoon and moving him over as he did so, another stupid habit. Or just Mingyu's way of showing off his height, and strength. 

"I'm gonna kill you Mingyu!" he whispered harshly to his friend who was busy making himself comfortable. The younger, but taller boy just winked at him. 

Jihoon crawled over Mingyu(purposefully putting a lot of weight on him as he did so, but no one needs to know that)  and sat cross legged on his bed. He looked up and saw Soonyoung standing awkwardly in the corner, "You can sit down." Jihoon said as he motioned towards the end of the bed. Soonyoung's lips curled up and he quickly sat down on the bed. 

"Me and Mingyu never really do anything interesting we just kind of bask in our laziness so really if you get bored you can leave, it won't offend me." Jihoon informed him because really all they did was nap or sit and talk, nothing interesting. But Soonyoung just seemed even happier when he heard Jihoon say that. Everything seemed to make him happy. 

"I know this is weird because I don't live here but can I take a nap? I'm really tired I didn't sleep that well last night." Soonyoung's cheeks heated up and Jihoon heard Mingyu laugh, only adding to his embarrassment. Jihoon smacked Mingyu before turning to Soonyoung.

"Go ahead, I don't mind." Jihoon shrugged and got up to walk to his closet. He pulled out a soft blanket that usually went to Mingyu when he slept over, but oh well, he walked back over to the bed and handed the blanket to Soonyoung who accepted it happily. Seemingly too happily for a boy who was embarrassed a second ago.

His bed was easily able to fit all three of them, while one of them was at the end of the bed. But if all three of them were to lay side by side it would be touchy so Jihoon offered his spot up to Soonyoung who refused it, but of course Jihoon was persistent. If he touched Soonyoung even in the slightest he’d probably cry. 

In the end Soonyoung took Jihoon's spot and Jihoon sat at the end with his legs on Mingyu's lap(which sucked for the younger boy). You could tell how tired Soonyoung was just by looking at him, or at least Jihoon could. Maybe watching from afar for so long might have shown him some things. Mingyu on the other hand didn't seem to get the memo, even as Soonyoung’s eyes drifted closed, he still  seemed to have hundreds of things to share. 

Soonyoung started to fall asleep and his eyes grew heavy, his eyes fluttering closed every couple of seconds. But he didn't fall asleep. He couldn't. Not until big mouthed Mingyu shut up, so while he was talking Jihoon gave him a quick(not too hard) kick in the stomach and told him to shut up. He did. Knowing Mingyu he only did it in fear of getting kicked again. But that still works for Jihoon.

 

A couple minutes later, Soonyoung was already fast asleep. Mingyu, on the other hand seemed to be quite content with typing away, a bright smile on his face.  "Who are you talking to?" Jihoon asked quietly and Mingyu looked up at him, "Minghao". Jihoon tried his best not to pout, he didn't hate Minghao, he thought the boy was funny. He just hated how close he and Mingyu were. 

He just doesn't  like how Minghao looked good in everything. Even at the earliest times(Mingyu dragged Minghao along to their “hideout” once, Minghao was half asleep).  He doesn't like how Minghao was able to become friends with people instantly. Jihoon couldn't even talk to people. No one likes him. He doesn't like the fact that he just met Mingyu but they were already extremely close. It took Jihoon a year, maybe more, to get close to him. He doesn't like how Mingyu always seemed happier with him. With Minghao, Mingyu talked on and on, his voice dilated with excitement. But with Jihoon, he always seemed bored. 

He didn't see himself as the jealous type. Definitely not. He was more of a self conscious type and when it came to Mingyu, his only close friend, he was full of insecurities. Sure, Jihoon has other friends. Just, none of them were there for him like Mingyu was. Mingyu is an outgoing person and he likes being in big friend groups, something Jihoon doesn't have, something he can't give. Something Minghao has. Something Mingyu could leave Jihoon for. Something Mingyu will leave Jihoon for. 

"Don't worry Ji, you're my bestest friend in the whole world," he spread his arms out as he said whole to add to his point. Jihoon nodded pulling a smile onto his face. If Mingyu leaves him, he wants to make the most of their time together. Mingyu pulled Jihoon over to him, still sensing his discomfort. He hugged him tightly as he whispered to him, "Besides I don't see him like that." 

I love you baby

Not staring at Soonyoung while he is sleeping is virtually impossible for Jihoon. He knows it's creepy. But when he sees Soonyoung's cheeks flushed and his hair flopped on the pillow beside him he can't help but stare. If Soonyoung was adorable while he was awake sleeping Soonyoung was something else, he made Jihoon's hearts to flips and no matter how creepy he knew he was being he couldn't look away. He wanted to look away. He really did. He just couldn't. 

At least, he couldn't until Mingyu spoke up, "You're being creepy. I get that you like him a lot but watching him sleep is very odd." his voice laced with playful judgement(or at least Jihoon hoped it was playful).

"Shut Up Minnie." Jihoon elbowed him(he was currently still in Mingyu's lap because the younger boy refused to let him go, something about proving himself), "He just looks really cute." 

"You've liked him for so long. Why don't you just confess." Mingyu said and looked down at Soonyoung to make sure he hadn't woken up before continuing, "Once senior year is over you'll lose all your chances." 

"I can't." Jihoon shook his head, "He could never like someone like me." 

"Someone like you? What does that mean?" Mingyu tightened his grip on Jihoon and started playing with his hair, Jihoon always tended to get nervous opening up to people, even Mingyu. So the younger boy did what he could to protect him. "I think you're pretty great. What's wrong with you?" 

"You’re only saying that. You know me, he doesn't. He's outgoing. He's friends with everyone. I only have you, and sometimes Jun and Seungkwan, I am awkward and grumpy." Jihoon sighed, "Besides i'm fine with just pining from afar." 

"How much do you like him?"

"A lot." Jihoon whispered, "I've never liked anyone like this before. I think i'm past the point of liking him." 

And if it's quite alright  
I need you baby  
To warm the lonely nights

 

 After that day Jihoon didn't talk to Soonyoung for a while. Not that it mattered to Jihoon, he still stared. He still got caught. Just this time he had no one to tell his ‘tale of woe’ to, him and Mingyu started drifting apart. Jihoon wished he could say he didn't care. 

 

Mingyu started talking to Minghao more, a lot more. At first it didn't bother Jihoon because Mingyu always came back to him to rant about Minghao, but then he didn't. Then he stopped meeting Jihoon in the hallway before lunch, he stopped sitting with Jihoon. He stopped coming over to Jihoon’s house late at night, he stopped sneaking in Jihoon’s window and into his bed(Jihoon always pretended to hate it but really it made him feel special, Mingyu did it for him). Now Mingyu did everything for Minghao. 

 

Because of that Jihoon now had no one. When he went to the forest a mile off his house, he was lonely. The usual laughter was nowhere to be found. His shoulder yearned for its usual warmth. The secrets exchanged deep in the forest were stuck inside his chest.

 

Jihoon was lying in his bed. Not uncommon. But usually whenever he would lay on his, soft, bed his mind would go blank, but it seemed to be buzzing in that moment. It was a Friday night, which meant Mingyu usually would be over at his house. But he wasn't. His Snapchat showed that he was at Minghao’s house(with a big group of people). Jihoon tried not to let it get to him. But if he’s gonna be honest the minute he saw Mingyu’s story his heart broke a little. People wouldn't get it. Having your best friend taken away from you, right in front of your eyes. So much pain can come from one seemingly little event. 

 

He needed to grow up and stop obsessing. 

 

He needed a distraction, and that's exactly what he got. 

 

Soonyoung: are you awake? 

 

Jihoon: uh, yeah? 

 

Soonyoung: this is so random I'm sorry!! I know I only ever text you for school related things but I have no one to talk to :( 

 

Jihoon: you can talk to me 

 

Jihoon: but I'm not very interesting 

 

Soonyoung: I think you're interesting 

 

Soonyoung: I also think you're one of the most talented people at our school!! I'm so jealous:”(

 

Jihoon’s heart may have quickened it's pace. It's loneliness replaced with a new feeling. A feeling that only Soonyoung could make him feel. 

 

Jihoon: thank you.

 

Soonyoung: why don't I ever see you and Mingyu together anymore? You went from being inoperable to never being seen together, you look so sad:(

 

Jihoon: it's nothing.

 

Jihoon: you don't have to worry about it.

 

Soonyoung: well I'm worried about -you- 

 

Soonyoung: let's hang out tomorrow!!! 

 

Jihoon: okay. 

 

Soonyoung: Goodnight!! I’ll see you tomorrow:))))

 

Jihoon: goodnight. 

 

Maybe it was supposed to happen like this. Out with one person, in with the next. Maybe, he shouldn't get his hopes up. Maybe, he should get used to being alone. After all who would want to stay with him? 

 

I love you baby  
Trust in me when I say  
Oh pretty baby  
Don't let me down I pray

 

Jihoon and Soonyoung got close. Really close. Jihoon still had a massive crush on Soonyoung, in fact he may have fallen more. He just learned to control it. 

 

Soonyoung started to confide in him. Jihoon tried to do the same. Whenever Soonyoung hugged him he felt his heart pulse out of his chest and he heard it in his ears. Jihoon tried to do the things he couldn't do for his past friendships. He didn't feel like himself sometimes but when he saw the smile on Soonyoung’s face he didn't care, that's all that mattered. 

 

 Jihoon took Soonyoung to the forest. The place that him and Mingyu started up. The place they shared, only trusting certain people with it. Jihoon trusted Soonyoung, and he wanted to show him a place that made him feel comforted. 

 

Sometimes he would call Soonyoung over to the spot and they'd sit there. Talking, laughing, anything they could think of. Sometimes Jihoon would sit in Soonyoung’s lap, the olders arms draped lazily around his waist as they talked animatedly. 

 

 Jihoon got an Instagram notification, tagged by Soonyoung. He opened it and saw a picture of him, one he didn't know was taken. He had to admit he looked good, his smile was small but genuine, which is why Jihoon liked the picture so much. Being with Soonyoung felt genuine. 

 

He stayed on Instagram, he refreshed his feed only to see a post by Mingyu. A picture of him and Minghao captioned: best friends. 

 

Oh 

 

Jihoon couldn't refrain from commenting. But he could only put oh, that's all he could think of. That's all that tan through his mind.  He was so vulnerable just from two words, really showed what kind of a person he was. 

He needed to clear his mind. But he didn't want to be alone, so he texted Soonyoung to meet him at the spot. And so they met there. Soonyoung immediately embracing Jihoon, who’s pulsing heart made it impossible for him to hear what Soonyoung,was saying. Whenever Soonyoung hugged him he had a habit of stroking Jihoon’s cute. Jihoon finds it cute. He also finds Soonyoung cute. 

 

Soonyoung pulled out of the hug and sat down on a nearby rock, gesturing for Jihoon to do the same. When the shorter male did he spoke up, “I saw the post are you okay?” 

 

“I’m fine. I can't really get mad at Mingyu because I'm doing the same thing as him.” Jihoon sighed and tried to ignore the confused look on Soonyoung’s face. 

 

“What do you mean by that?” 

 

“Well we are both getting close to the person we like, and in turn we abandoned each other.” Jihoon shrugged and tried to act like his heart wasn't running wild. He knew they wouldn't leave without some sort of confession, and that was scary, nerve wracking honestly. 

 

“Who do you like?” Soonyoung asked like he hadn't just sped up Jihoon’s heart to the point where it felt like he may cry, and he probably will. 

 

“I like you.” 

 

Oh pretty baby  
Now that I've found you stay  
And let me love you, oh baby  
Let me love you

 

Soonyoung froze, his eyes immediately found their way to his feet. He spoke in a quiet tone, "I'm sorry Jihoon I don't see you in that way, I like someone else." 

 

His heart may have broken; just a little. The one who brought him back into the light was now pushing him back into the darkness. At this point he wasn't even worried about his feelings, he was just worried about their friendship. He just ruined their friendship. He was alone again. 

“oh, that's fine.” Jihoon forced a smile. “Can we still be friends? I don't want things to be awkward so let's pretend this never happened?” 

 

“Okay, I’ll see you around.” He smiled. A fake smile, Jihoon, no anyone, could tell. He waved at him before walking off. Jihoon kept his eyes on his back until things got blurry. He watched until he drowned. 

 

And just like that they never talked again.


End file.
